Can I sleep now?

That was one seriously hectic week, dudes and dudettes. As most of you will be aware, I didn’t win the Aurealis Award for Best Fantasy Short Story. That honour was shared by Richard Harland and Louise Katz. I did, however, have a blast at the after-ceremony cocktail party, and schmoozed my little arse off.

To cut out the boring bits (actually, there were no boring bits. Even the word games the kids came up with on the bus rides were fun), highlights and lowlights:

LOWLIGHTS: Only 3: 1. Sleeping in a single bed with Luscious. I’m too fat and crippled to be able to do that anymore. Which is a bugger, because I used to like it. Ah well, the wall of our bedroom probably still has a print of my back on it… 2. Losing that goddamn award. Yeah, so I’m a petty, small, vindictive bastard, but I wanted it, and I’m jealous as all buggery that I was beaten to it by a couple of worthless hacks who aren’t fit to lace my drinks… (Richard and Louise are actually bloody talented, and deserved their awards, and as anyone who knows me will tell you I didn’t expect to win it, but you know, they pause just before they read out the names, and you can’t help holding your breath… Anyway, Richard and Louise are thoroughly deserving winners. Now I really have to win the next one…) 3. Having our DVD camera stolen. Luscious talks about this on her blog, so I shan’t go on about what we lost, but it was still a pisser.

HIGHLIGHTS: Too many to mention. The Awards Ceremony, even if I didn’t win anything. The after-ceremony cocktail party. Watching as the three baldest men in SF had their picture taken together- Sean Williams, Rob Hood, and Connor Battersby. I will so be posting that one when I get a copy! Catching up with so many good pals I don’t get the chance to see often enough, such as Donna Hansen, Sean Williams, Rob Hood and Cat Sparks, and especially the truly fabulous Robert Hoge and Kate Eltham, and my co-mutual-admiration-society-president Geoffrey Maloney. Catching up with so many cool people I’d only e-met before, including the likes of Trevor Stafford, Stephen Thompson, Kaaron Warren, the luvverly Kirsten Bishop (who gave me the coolest version of her book The Etched City, complete with corrections in the author’s own hand), the super-luvverly Kim Wilkins, who was this close to stealing Connor and running (much to her partner’s nervousness), and Josephine Pennicott. Hanging out with Ellen Datlow and the room-o’-writers at the seminar the following day. What a scary assemblage of talent that was. I have some work to do: there were a lot of people much higher in the food chain than your humble blatherer, and it was a reminder of just where I stand in the order of things. The museum. The science centre, where I learnt just how fast I can throw a cricket ball (not too shabby, after so long out of the game). The swimming beach. Toscani’s. Listening to Cassie spend almost an entire week trying to pronounce Toscani’s properly. Movieworld. Going backwards down the Scooby-Doo ride, trying not to scream like a girl (I don’t do roller coaster rides), giving up, and screaming my arse off. Listening to my 3 year old daughter cackle like a witch all the way through the Batman thrill ride. Connor puking on Marilyn Monroe. Shopping. Much shopping. Watching Godzilla Vs MechaGodzilla at Rob Hood’s Godzilla panel for Fantastic Queensland’s Summer of Speculative Fiction. Debating with the boys all the way home as to whether Godzilla is a good guy or a bad guy or just a bloody big lizard with cool powers. The delight and excitement on Luscious’ face when she finally found the perfect shoes for our wedding. Catching up with Clarionite pals Shane Jiraiya Cummings and Lily Chrywenstrom. There’s more…

MOVIEWORLD: Okay, so it’s over-priced, and believe it or not, there isn’t as much to do as Adventure World here in Perth. BUT: the kids went mad, and for that alone it was worth the 2 hour wait for a bus after the park closed. Now, I’m not saying I bought into the madness, but given that I hate Scooby-Doo and I don’t do roller coasters, who’s the fat guy with the bald spot in the photo? (The photo, mind you, is how I learned I have a bald spot…). A long, hot, sunburn-filled day that saw us staggering under the weight of merchandising, rolls of film, and with grins like insane tourist types. Which we were 🙂

Quote of the day: “I didn’t tell him to do that so I had an excuse…” Me, trying to pacify the Marilyn Monroe impersonator as I rubbed his vomit off her thigh.

MY SON IS A LUCKY, LUCKY, LITTLE BUGGER: Kim Wilkins, Cat Sparks, Marilyn Monroe, Kate Eltham… I can name about a million fan boys who’d kill for that kind of hugging action.

DID I MENTION THE SHOPPING? Brisbane is much cheaper than Perth when it comes to the important things. Like comics, and books, and all the other crap we came home with. Personal shopping highlights: the $1 packets of Yu-Gi-Oh cards we got for the boys; 2 Hellboy graphic novels that pretty much complete my collection; the Buddy Christ figurine; shoes for both Lyn and Cassie for the wedding; Maus book II (finally!); book 3 of Evan Dorkin’s Hectic Planet series, more books than you can find in my local library, discovering Comics Etc. and Underworld Realm, Lyn’s hot Goth boots (runs off for cold shower, returns. Types more slowly due to shaking hands), The Dead Kennedy’s Frankenchrist and The Cramps’ Look Mom, No Head albums. There’s more…

Told you we did a lot of shopping.


Some titles from the Look Mom, No Head table of contents-

Two Headed Sex Change
Blow Up Your Mind
Bend Over, I’ll Drive
Eyeball In My Martini
Hipsville 29 BC

Any questions?


Sometimes friends go beyond the call of duty for you, and in doing so give you something truly precious. Our Brisbane holiday will be a happy memory for all of us, yet without Robert Hoge and Kate Eltham it would not have happened at all. Robert and Kate are the convenors of Clarion South, and made available the convenor’s apartment so that our entire family had accomodation for free. Without such a kind and generous gesture, we could not have afforded to take our family of 7 on such a trip. Our gratitude knows no bounds. Thank you, Robert and Kate. We’re in your debt.


So I didn’t write while I was in Queensland. So sue me, I was on holiday!

I’ll be doing a lot of work next week to catch up. Promise.

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