JESUS? NICE GUY. CATERED MY COUSIN’S WEDDING.

Well, bugger me. I was expecting less than 50%, considering how much I actually know about the Bible. Of course, when questions like How did Jesus feed the 5000? have possible answers like pizza and Chinese take-out, I’m guessing I can’t get credits for previous study when I apply for seminary school….

You know the Bible 79%!

Wow! You are truly a student of the Bible! Some of the questions were difficult, but they didn’t slow you down! You know the books, the characters, the events . . . Very impressive!

Ultimate Bible Quiz
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Incidentally, extra points for knowing what I’m quoting in the title of this post….

DOING SOMETHING RIGHT

Inside Erin’s classroom at school is a big picture of a tree. On that tree are hung a bunch of leaves. One each leaf is the name of one of the children in the class, and the word that best describes them. There are a lot of leaves marked friendliness.

Erin’s is marked honesty.

I spent all of last week at home, suffering from the accumulation of large physicall irritants. On Friday morning, at the pleading of my daughter, I levered myself out of bed and accompanied Lyn & Connor to watch Erin receive a merit certificate at her school assembly. Why? For having an enthusiastic attiude to her work and always trying hard to present it neatly and accurately.

Engage proud mode. Proud mode engaged.

Our beautiful daughter

THE MOTHER’S DAY CLASSIC: TWICE IN A ROW IS A TRADITION

Let’s get one thing straight: the last thing you’ll see me doing on Father’s Day is getting up at the crack of aaaargh in order to run 3.5 kilometres around Lake Monger in the name of breast cancer research. And I especially won’t be doing it for the second year running, and I definitely won’t shave something in the order of two entire minutes off last year’s time, never mind doing all this less than 24 hours after testing myself against a bunch of huge, burly fellows who want to be train guards, doing high-speed beep tests and dragging mannequins that weigh 13 kilograms more than I do from pillar to posts all afternoon because, well, it just occurred to me that it might be something I wanted to do.

It’s pretty bloody nice being married to Superwoman, you know……

My wife described in one word: phwoaaaarrrrr.

IN WHICH A CERTAIN WIFE AND MOTHER GETS WHAT’S COMING TO HER…

Jehovah’s Witnesses don’t celebrate Mother’s Day. The husbands and children’s of Jehovah’s Witnesses, on the other hand, occasionally get all bullheaded and insist that the giving of presents and making of meals has nothing to do with what the Jehovah’s Witness wants, and that it’s a chance for them to express just what she means to them, so she can just sit down, eat her favourite soup for lunch and cottage fish pie for dinner, read the handmade cards, unwrap the handmade paper, and accept the candlestick, goblet, cushion, and painted pot plant that they’ve given her.

Occasionally, Jehovah’s Witnesses have the grace and love to accept such a scenario, and allow that, just maybe, they might deserve the overwhelming love their family has for them.

Which she does 🙂

OH GOD, MILK I NEVER DRANK JUST CAME OUT OF MY NOSE

So over at the blog of legendary manbeastchild Jason Fischer, he’s listed a meme that shows you what your battle cry should be. And his is quite cool: I’m going to pummel you with such reckless abandon, you will wake up from the Matrix

Gnarly, huh? I can see Jasoni crying this out as his crime fighting alter ego, Cannibal Camel.

So, you know, I’m going to try this and come up with a cool battle cry I can yell whilst leaping off buildings in my tights n the dead of night and bringing to justice evil guys with names like The DeathPanther and Murderghost and Bald Guy From Survivor and stuff.

So what do I get?

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Striding out of the mountains, attacking with a piece of chainlink fence, cometh Lee Battersby! And he gives a booming scream:

“I’m going to beat the flaming shit out of you!”

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There go my chances of Robert Downey Junior playing me in the movie…