BE IT EVER SO DISTANT, THERE’S NO-ONE LIKE HOME.

6.45, sitting watching telly. Knock on the door. Pizza guy with an order for this address. Not us, mate. We didn’t order any pizza. He goes back to the car to check, comes back with a live phone call.

Erin’s friends, 1500km away, ordered her a dessert pizza for Valentine’s Day.

Shutup, *you’re* crying!

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