THUMBNAIL THURSDAY DEMANDS YOUR SWEET THINGS

Of all the delightful traditions that Americans have introduced to the world– turning up late for wars; gunning down their own children for the crime of going to school; friendly fire– teaching your kids that you can go door to door in disguise, demanding gifts to ward off the physical destruction of your home is surely one of the quaintest.

It only takes one evil genius with a taste of chocolate and an understanding of the classics……

 

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“Granted, Madam. Physically, he is nothing like a child. Still, I’d recommend giving him

all your candy, unless you want him to throw that lovely daughter of yours into

the nearest lake.”

 

 

THUMBNAIL THURSDAY HAS BEEN IN ONE TOO MANY TEAM MEETING

To say I have never enjoyed working in the various levels of Government service to which I was sentenced is an understatement. In a quarter of century, I found less than half a dozen colleagues with whom I wished to have any contact outside of the workplace, and countless hundreds I would welcome alien abduction in order to avoid acknowledging them in the street.

Let’s be honest: this cartoon isn’t funny. It’s just true.

 

 

0140

“I think you underestimate my achievement in refraining

from gunning you all down like dogs.”

THUMBNAIL THURSDAYS EATS ITS 5+2

Vampires are comedy gold, for one very good reason: vampires are stupid. Not the legends and folklore that lie at the heart of the vampire– many of them are truly fascinating, and far more entertaining than the versions we see today. What I’m referring to is the Westernised, post-Lugosi, bowdlerised version with which Hollywood and teen romances burden us on a regular basis.

If it sparkles, burn it with fire.

 

0126

“I just have one of those metabolisms– I can eat and eat, and never put any weight on.”

THUMBNAIL THURSDAY DIPS INTO TWO SHALLOW WELLS

As previously discussed, weddings and marriage are comedic base-level subjects. And when it comes to SF, aliens and alien abductions are pretty much the humour versions of opening your eyes and stretching first thing in the morning, too.

So, naturally, I put them together. because if there’s one thing my cartooning career was a celebration of, it was laziness and simple ideas. Mind you, I actually find this one funny, so what does that say about me?

 

 

0008

“He wants to call off the abduction!”

THUMBNAIL THURSDAY PROMISES TO LOVE, HONOUR, AND OBEY. PROBABLY.

Weddings and marriage are the comedic equivalent of the starter-for-ten. It’s entry level stuff, fit only for shite American sitcoms and the laziest of stand up comedians playing to the lowest common denominator audiences.

So, here’s one of many I did when I was busier flexing my ability to come up with ideas quickly than exercising my internal editor. Regrets, I have a few… (although, weirdly, the fact that the bride looks like a frog had sex with a muppet is not amongst them)

 

0205

“What do you mean, ‘What are the options?’ ?”

THUMBNAIL THURSDAY STICKS IT UP T’MANAGEMENT

Amongst my many issues with religion is the clear and obvious notion that any organisation that promotes exclusivity based on special circumstance is hardly very fucking democratic, especially when it’s used to reinforce a theocratic subservience.

In other words, “Oi, big yin, who died and made you God, eh?”

We fought in the streets to overturn big management for the overprivileged like this, brother.

 

0018

“100% unemployment, no public works, no representation for the rank and file, not even an organised union? Looks like I got here just in time!”

THUMBNAIL THURSDAY REVS UP THE ELDERLY

There’s a bizarre and somewhat colourful subset of the Australian homosapien (Boganus Mountpanoramaii) who seems only to be fulfilled by cranking out a donkshaft with double carved ollies and lowering the drive bar to up the torquey toasterage. You know, hotting shit up.

I figure chair lifts are as good as a 1970s Torana. Probably better, if we’re honest……

 

0064

“What’s say we open this baby up and see what she can really do?”

THUMBNAIL THURSDAY AND THE ART OF THE DIMINISHING RETURN

Back when I was contemplating attempting a career in cartooning, it was clear that the one of the best ways to attract the attention of newspapers in particular was to offer them a series– much like Star Wars films, if producers feel they have a product they can keep screwing into the ground long past the point where anyone even remembers why they started doing this thing, it helps them not think about how to fill their calendars. Think about Garfield. Remember when it was funny?

Exactly.

One the ideas I flirted with was a wordless cartoon, featuring a Swami-like character who used his mystical gifts to counter mundane problems and to entertain himself. This is one of the ideas I quickly scribbled out to see if the concept had legs– the Swami, floating in mid-air, playing skip-rope with his cobra.

Hey, I’m not saying it was a good idea…

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THUMBNAIL THURSDAY MAKES A DEAL

The Devil– like Santa, Death and pandas– is another of those wonderfully flexible concepts that lends itself to anything, particularly humour. There is simply so much cultural baggage built up around the character; so many snippets of folklore, superstition, and outright bullshit; so many stories. The deal at the cross-roads is one that has crossed over into real life– the great Robert Johnson used it as part of his mystique. As the guitar is an update on the fiddle, so the mixing desk.

 

0150

“Okay, kid. First of all, ask yourself– what would you even do

with a mixing desk made out of solid gold?”

 

THUMBNAIL THURSDAY TURNS IT UP TO 11

It took me a few moments to work out what was going on in this one. That’s a giant speaker on the right: the guy in front has played a chord, and it’s blown his skin right off his skeleton. A perfect example of something that would have looked great when it was fully drawn, if I had the skill, but the thumbnail shows I wouldn’t have had the skill to do it.

Stick to writing. Stick to writing.

 

0017

“We’ll take it.”